Life Is a Mirror: It Reflects You

Looking into your heart mirror gives you a clear vision.

Every person who has been a parent or in another leadership role knows the futility of lecturing and trying to change the other. Still, that doesn’t stop the resolve to try to control the other’s behavior or force our desired outcome(s). Why? Because we want to change what makes us uncomfortable on the inside, embracing our shadow sides is uncomfortable. As leaders, we are often blinded by our lack of insight into our deepest selves. It often doesn't occur to us that the best way to create change is not to convince others to change but to change ourselves. When we adjust and embrace what’s within, we become free to be empowered role models for others.

Leading by example is more inspiring than a lecture or an argument.

Let me share a personal example. My daughter has “unreasonable” expectations of me. Knowing that the outside is a reflection of the inside, I chose to observe inside me to see if there were ways in which I was holding “unreasonable” expectations. Like me, it might be enlightening to discover that you struggle with holding people to your high standards in ways you couldn't see until you looked. Once you see your expectations of others, witnessing this truth within your heart, you will have compassion for yourself, enabling you to have compassion for the person you are judging.

As you drop your expectations, your inner integrity could be an incredible inspiration to others.

So, when looking for what is wrong, we often project what’s inside us to the outside world. If you see something in the world that you want to change, say hate, try taking responsibility for embracing the hate inside you. Instead of being angry with those you hate, seek out the roots of your hatred and come to terms with your power to transform it.

The outside world is just a mirror that reflects us back to ourselves. When faced with challenges such as violence, can we look inside our hearts for the roots of violence? This may be the best way to lead the world toward a higher level of consciousness and compassion.